"Well I'm not the kind to live in the past
The years run too short and the days too fast..." Sung by Al Stewart
After Halloween, I usually start pondering the onset of the new year ahead. I keep thinking about whether I made the best use of my time and whether my heart was in the right place concerning those I love and those who love me. I am beginning to see that life has made me less defensive and less apologetic.
I have been the recipient of so much kindness lately. The grocery store journeys have apparently brought out the very best in people as I load up my shopping cart and have to reach for guacamole. (I know, I've mentioned this before...)But what I have witnessed is plain kind gestures and assistance. I embrace the kindness of others like never before. Maybe I never paid attention in my youth but I do now and believe me I offer the same kindness when I can. I don't apologize for going that extra mile either. The older I become, the more being a decent human being matters. Time is precious. How we treat ourselves and others matter. I will never apologize for defending what I know to be fair and socially appropriate.
When we keep our expectations of others at a reasonable level, we experience less disappointment, less discouragement and less hurt. We may even become pleasantly surprised by keeping our expectations low and being shown something beautiful and life-affirming. We must put ourselves in the position of protecting ourselves. We do that by thinking of ourselves first. This is how we can give freely when it's warranted. We give because we can. We give because we are grateful for the blessings we have been given. At least, that's what my "Optimistic-Self" tells me. We give to others after ensuring we have put our health and inner strength first.
Sometimes time passes and we forget to pay attention. I realized this when I became an aunt and when I started teaching. I noticed how quickly my nephews and niece were growing up and how my students would move up a grade in what seemed like a "nano-second." Change is inevitable and the key to embracing change is to recognize it as a part of life.
I am learning not to be fearful or impatient. I am learning to be comfortable with imperfection. The passage of time heals more than it hurts. Hear endeth this lesson.
