"The Unbearable Lightness of Being"

“Chance and chance alone has a message for us. Everything that occurs out of necessity, everything expected, repeated day in and day out, is mute. Only chance can speak to us.”― Milan Kundera, The Unbearable Lightness of Being

   

     Since as long as I can remember, I wanted to "be." At four, I wanted to be a ballerina. At six I wanted to be a writer. At nine I wanted to be an actor AND a ballerina AND a writer. Go figure. I am none of those. I take my walks. I listen to the birds and soak in the sun. I need the quiet and the solitude. Until these past of couple of years, I was never cognizant of how important that is and then I remember, "I am a teacher." But is this the last part of my journey? What have I "taught" myself?

     After walking three miles today, I realized that we all take many paths and as long as we have the passion for them, we need to take them ...We need to put one foot in front of the other and go. I wiped the sweat from my face and suddenly came to the conclusion that the one thing that motivates any of us is the prospect of change. Change invites fear, doubt and the courage to take a chance. Ho w do we do this? Well, I think we need to be forced into the change. None of us appreciates being forced into anything but typically when that happens, we act. We learn. We change. Those of us "in between" are frustrated and deeply unhappy either temporarily or permanently.

     Human nature dictates that those who do not follow the norm very often trail blaze. They challenge the norms of society and change it. For better or worse, history provides many examples of both. For most of us, we discover our personal passions in a much less turbulent way. The question is when do we become happy with what we have? When are we just happy "being?" Those who find "being" unbearable, are most likely facing their fears and in doing so, are afraid to follow their passions. We have all been there in one way or the other. Marriage, teaching and acting have taught me well on all of these counts. So then, why do we hesitate?

     I believe that these hesitations stem from a lack of patience. We think or we have been influenced to believe that we should have certain things by a certain time in our lives. We become "heavy." We become weighted down with negativity. We become stuck. In those moments, hours, days, weeks, years, we forget to lighten up. We need to free ourselves from the past and look at the future ONLY when we have a handle on the "now." Nothing is permanent. Everything changes. The challenge is to remember that we are not alone. We can evolve and those who care about us love us regardless of the struggle and the change. They understand because they have been through similar challenges.  They have the empathy.  We need to gravitate to those who are empathetic.  We need to gravitate to those who are honest.

     So find the light. Sometimes all we have to do is be patient and "be." It will be enough for those who love you.