"With a Conscience" - "Tall enough?"

 

        From the day we're conceived we have no choice really as to how we will evolve physcially.  This is true.  This is fact.  When I was born, Mom couldn't believe I was five pounds and spent my first days in an incubator.  Little did I know or understand that your physical appearance would mean more than I anticipated.  My grandmother Maria, my Aunt Bea and Aunt Edie were all petite women.  They were indeed, a trifecta of bravery and spunk. I didn't realize it at the time but height is not a deficit.  It becomes a game changer when others tell you it's a deficit.  This brings a further discussion.  "Why?"

        It started out being fun to be singled out for my height.  It breeds a great deal of attention. That is until I headed to junior high.  Shorter women keep extra pounds on.  On the bus, "Meatball" became my nickname.  I fought that guy by yelling at him.  He ended up being one of my best buds on the bus and protected me because he felt like it.  I did a fairly good job of protecting myself in junior high. When you're different, people notice, good, bad or otherwise.

        Buying clothes for me was always a challenge for my mother.  Nothing ever fit because back in the 60's, petites were NOT readily available. Boys jeans were cool though. I didn't mind.  Plus Mom sewed many of my clothes and knitted my sweaters.  Despite the height issue, I knew I was loved.  

        As I grew up to a whooping 4'9" tall, I headed  into adulthood.  My first year of college, I gained a great deal of attention from the Lacrosse players in my dorm.  They enjoyed picking me up and swinging me around.  I got swung around a lot in college.  Not that I regret that one bit. I became an attention seeker and that suited me just fine at theater auditions and off course on the stage. 

     I have made me physical appearance work for me but has taken years.  When people ask how tall I am, I say, "Tall enough." We don't fit a mold.  We are different. No one is the same and we shouldn't want to be. I learned that the hard way over the years and fought some prejudicial experiences looking for a teaching job believe it or not.  But things come to you if you are persistent.  

        My Grandma Maria passed at the age of 98.  Up until that time, she was still chopping would outside with my dad. She loved homecooked food told me each day that she loved me. I learned a great deal about how to be a human being from her. I learned to be heard despite the height.  What makes us different, makes us human and teaches others that "the norm" is not necessarily what we expect.