With a Conscience - " Thanksgiving"

"If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, "thank you," that would suffice."  ~Meister Eckhart

I can't exactly remember when I forgot to be grateful for the gracious, wonderful things in my life.  Somehow, at some point, I let so many outside influences dictate my happiness, my peace of mind that years went by without showing any gratitude for the life I have led.  My life has moved so fast that it hardly seems possible that I had forgotten about gratitude.  

I thought I was a decent human being.  I thought I had my priorities straight and my life in order.  Marriage changed all of that but the one thing that I keep thinking about today, this morning in fact, is the issue of being gracious and thankful for so many things. The years of turkey and stuffing at the family dinner table never entered my mind.  So here is what I'm thankful for and hopefully my readers can identify with some of these observations.

• I'm thankful for shoes.  Yes, shoes.  Here's why.  Millions around the world don't have them.  My closet is filled with marvelous shoes that have defined my moods, my personality and my individuality.  Millions around the world don't know what that feels like. I am a brat.  That old saying "Walk a mile in my shoes"...well let me tell you, if we did that, we would all be much more compassionate and empathetic.
• I'm thankful for clothing.  Macy's, Kohl's, Walmart, J.C. Penney's, lower your prices even more!  People need to afford decent clothing.  Clothing defines who we are and what we project to the world.  I have to admit that I've been a complete brat about my love of clothes and now, all I think about is those people who can't afford to clothe their families.  I donate my clothing.  I donate a LOT of clothing, every year.
• I'm thankful for food.  I'm thankful for really, REALLY delicious food.  My family, my grandmother, my mother, my two sisters, well, we all cook.  Cooking and, eating, was and is the joy of our youth and our adult life.  It's where we all share our talents and our gratitude for being together.  It's always been that way, but it means more to me these days.   It means, we unite after not seeing each other and it means we pass the torch of our love and respect for each other.  Traditions are held with every home cooked meal and every celebration at the table.  I'm thankful for pizza too.  I'm sorry but I'm thankful for pizza.
• I'm thankful for family. I was born because my parents were committed.  It wasn't perfect for them but they knew where their priorities lived.  I'm thankful for the discipline that my mother and my father instilled in me. They knew I was never going to lead a conventional life but they tried.  I played by my rules but I always knew I was loved.  I'm thankful for their patience and their imperfections.  I'm thankful for their trust.  I'm thankful for my two sisters who are just so unbelievably talented and disciplined in so many various things and even though we are different, we really aren't.  We have the same connections that often scare me. I can't tell you how many times I've thought of one of them and suddenly, the phone rings or I call them and I hear, "Oh my, I was just thinking of you."  This has happened so many times that I embrace it.
• You knew this was coming.  I'm thankful for marriage.  I'm thankful for the ridiculous amount of patience marriage takes because it reminds each and every day that I need to walk my own truth and so does my husband.  As most couples find out, the days that are less than wonderful require even more patience and more gratitude.  They also require more love.  Your families give you unconditional love.  Your husband gives you love that is more intimate and more personal that it would be easy to be afraid and run away from it. We can fear that we will lose ourselves, our individuality but those are fears.  It doesn't have to be like that if we're happy with ourselves.   It also means that you really, REALLY love your husband so much in fact that you will go to Home Depot and Harbor Freight to get him the tool chest and pressure washer he REALLY, REALLY wants....But I digress...
• I'm thankful for my sense of humor.  I've lost my sense of humor so many times and that's not like me.  The days where I forget to laugh or crack a joke are dark days and not at all helpful when handling the situations that life gives us.  Sometimes humor has been a curse but for the most part, humor is the one saving grace we all have  Why some people don't use their sense of humor more is a mystery.  I will take laughter and tears together any day. This is life.  This is the ultimate balance we need to find if we are live with any kind of peace.  I'm also thankful for my hairdresser who covers my grays.  I'm thankful that I have a manicurist who gives me the best hand and shoulder massage that no matter what I've been through they seem to understand my pressure points.
• Finally, I'm thankful for all of my friendships and all of the experiences that have made me more flexible, more tolerant and more forgiving.  I'm thankful for the companionship and love that has been given to me two-fold all throughout my life and my life to come.  

Times are difficult for many.  No one gets a free ticket on life's train.  What I do hope is that the gratitude we give to ourselves and to others continues and that we all become more grateful as the years continue.  Bitterness and regret have no place in my Thanksgiving.  Gratitude saves us from ourselves.